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Tuesday, September 20, 2005

Goldfish Tie Project


Goldfish Tie Project (2)
Originally uploaded by JPhilipson.
I said that I would post a photo of my creation. The Goldfish Tie. I figured that they put goldfish in platform shoes back in the day, why not a tie with a gold fish in it? I couldn't believe that nobody thought of it before me. I finally made something original I guess. I wore it that day to school. Everybody thought it was great and the staff didn't even notice. Crazy huh?! If you want to see the photos of me making it you can check it out on my flickr account along with tons of other photos from my trip around Europe, and Eric and Megan's Wedding, and everyday crazy things. About Betty and I. I've given it to God. Let it go. I cried out to God on Saturday after I played Betty a game of Upwords. She was talking to everyone except me while we played. That wasn't the part that bugged me. After her annoying roomate that was sitting next to her preventing me from talking to her the entire time decided to run out of the room bursting into an emotional fit tears and all, Betty told me that she was sorry but had to go. She got up but then turned to a guy who she was listening to with a group of other people play the guitar and told him that she was sorry and that she had to go and would come back if she could. Betty was on a date. Right before her roomate started crying I asked her if she would like to go for a walk to talk and catch up. She defensively wanted to know why. I told her to catch up. She said that she doesn't want to because it would be considered a "date." (Under the college rule book) I told her that then we were just on a "date" and that if I do anything with her it would be considered a "date." She didn't want to so I just started asking her how her day was, then her roomate burst into tears. I don't know what to do anymore. So I left. My friends saw me leaving and knew just what happened. I got alone with God and cried. I gave up. Went back to my room and boxed everything she had given me, anything that reminded me of her, and everything that I was going to give her from my trip to Europe and threw it into a trash bag and lobbed it into the storage closet in our room. I wrote the last entry in the journal I was planning to give her and threw it into the bag as well. It still hurts. I'm still in love with her. However, if God wants me with her then it's going to have to be Him. I can't do it, I can't manipulate or find a crack. He's going to have to do it. Otherwise, He's going to have to take my love for her away.

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